Why are your balls oblong?

Get a group of testosterone laden, chest bumping hooligans together and throw a topic in the middle no matter how mundane and eventually they will find a way to segue into what almost always matters most in life: sports! Amongst Pacific Islander males who have had some significant exposure to two pervasively masculine sports, ultimately the conversation steers towards the topic of, ‘Which is bigger, yours or mine?’

In the United States there is no comparison between the game of rugby and its counterpart, American Football, thanks in large part to the National Football League which has made it a mainstream phenomenon. There are names in the NFL that are more popular amongst children and youths than politicians, Brad Pitt and his country brother Brad Paisley combined. Say the name Troy Polamalu and everyone from California in the west to Pittsburgh in the east can tell you that he is the long haired hitting machine that wears No. 43 for the Steelers. Say the same name in an English pub and their bound to throw you out with an accusation that you are cussing in your native tongue. Arguably the same can be said of rugby stars with a large international draw like Jonny Wilkinson or Jonah Lomu. If you don’t follow the sport, chances are you really don’t know the daily intricacies and dramas.

A long standing argument is that rugby players are tougher than football players because they don’t wear pads. Football players argue that if a rugby player were to stand in the path of a 240-pound wrecking ball they would get a better appreciation for the hits they sustain every Friday night under the lights or on Sunday afternoons on CBS.

Rugby players have better stamina and conditioning because the dimensions of the pitch is larger and they run non-stop for 40 minutes, rest for 15 and then run another 40 with a bit of stoppage time for good measure. Football players will contend that running at top speed, colliding head on with a wooly mammoth and sustaining that type of punishment for four 15 minute quarters will never be classified as a brisk stroll in the park followed by crumpets and tea on the lawn.

Regardless, there are minutiae in the preparation and execution of each game. There is a wholesome combination of speed, power and agility on both ends of the spectrum. There is fault and folly; there are oversights and lapses in judgment. But overall, whether you’re a fan of one or the other, once you come to understand the particulars of the game you least understand, you come to the realization that rugby players and football players are athletes with a love and a passion for their game of choice.